Thursday, April 7, 2011
(where I want to be)
Right now I am sitting at Starbucks. Alone. in an overstuffed comfy chair. Just me, my coffee, and my laptop. with nothing to do but enjoy. I have an hour before I have to pick up Aiden and whisk him off for a good hour plus drive for an AV appointment. I can't remember the last time I was in this type of situation. peace.and.quiet.
As I drove here my mind was calm, not racing like it usually is. I remembered back to when I was young, when I was constantly trying to define what kind of person I wanted to be, what career I'd hold, how successful I could possibly become, working for a big corporation downtown Dallas, if I worked hard at it. what my future looked like.
and I smiled ... or more like smirked ... and laughed at myself.
Because today, in my (later) thirties, I am finally reaching the point where I feel comfortable with me and where I'm at. I've learned that the person I am wasn't going to be predefined in my young twenties, but defined through life experiences and lessons learned along the way. I've learned that success isn't defined in how far up the corporate ladder you climb or dollar signs (although nice). I'm comfortable with my foundation, I'm peaceful, and
I LOVE my life.
Am I where I thought I'd be in my 20's? Hell no. In my 20's I was pure career. Finance major from a big 10 University on my way to becoming a successful business woman. I loved being married. Motherhood - definitely, stay at home mom - never.
and what does my resume look like today?
stay at home mom, soccer mom, speech therapist, cook, house maid, taxi driver, vet, nurse, psychologist (remember, the best therapy is free), moderator, wife, mother, daughter, sister, sister-in-law ... and the list goes on.
and (most days), I absolutely love it.
Today I got teary eyed. Teary eyed as I thought about who I've become and the family I have. I wouldn't change my current resume for the world. Nothing.Nada.Nilch.
I count my blessings every.single.day.
Believe me, there are still days I search for ways to get our from under it all and find ME again. There's definitely stress in my life. It happens. The important thing though is knowing my alone time is just as important as my family time and not to forget about me.
and that's exactly why I'm sitting here at Starbucks, alone, just me, my coffee, and this comfy chair.
cherishing the moment.
cherishing my life.