Okay. So yesterday I started off my day by helping Kailyn's teacher for a good hour or so, then hurried home to get Aiden ready for therapy. As I am driving down the highway, rushing, as always, to get to where we needed to be, I realized I truly did not want to go.
It's at 11:30 and the time just.does.not.work. BUT, it's the only time that's available right now, unless I want to take a late afternoon appt. and guess what, I don't. The drive is already 30 to 40 minutes, and although Aiden's missing his morning nap, not getting lunch until we get back, I feel the need to be home for my third grader when she walks through that door. I hate it for Aiden, yet she's still too young to come home to an empty house. Not happening. Not yet.
As I'm driving, I am feeling out of control with so much to do. Have to go here, need to do this, can't believe I forgot to rent Kailyn's violin since practice started TODAY, does Ryan have lunch money, we need milk, and I'm feeling like a crazed, frantic mom with a to-do list a mile long when all I want to do is go home and play with my little monkey ... or maybe not ...
because truly, at the moment, all I wanted to do was drop Aiden off with his dad at work and go have lunch on a patio with some good wine, good food, and good friends. Now that's a good stress reliever. BUT, back to reality, NOT HAPPENING.
So as I'm driving, I'm thinking of all the things I didn't get done/things I needed to do and just start laughing. We as moms put so much on our shoulders to be PERFECT. Perfect for our kids. Perfect for our husbands. Perfect for our parents. Perfect for our friends. Perfect for everyone but ourselves. When is the last time you truly did one good thing for yourself EVERY.SINGLE.DAY.OF.ONE.WHOLE.WEEK ? Okay, that's a lot to ask, so how about at least one day in one week?
Moms tend to take care of others first and themselves last. Then throw in one or more of any of the following: having more than one child, having a child with special needs, working full or part time, being a single parent, taking care of a parent(s), etc. etc. AND not to mention, whatever personal problems that may arise. I know I am just worn out by the end of the day. Why is this? Truly, if we took care of ourselves first everyone would be a lot happier, because mom would be happier. Right?
When I got home, I did myself an injustice and looked at my schedule for the next week and wish I hadn't. I had to let it go. So I went and poured myself a glass of wine.
That's when I realized I seriously need to start scheduling in some "ME" time ... and not just saying it, but actually writing it down on those great white board calendars for everyone.in.the.house.to.see. Because you know, if I'm going to get that "mom of the year award" (NOT), I better take care of me first.
Well, then fast forward to tonight. Hmmm, far from perfect.
Aiden's older brother had a baseball game. This place was not close, and in an area I've never been. This meant getting there, to say nicely, sucked and was very stressful (even with Miss GPS aka Miss B&*ch). On top of it all, Aiden's daddy had to work and I knew by the time I got home it would be too late for baths. So, here I go again, rushing to get homework completed, dinner done, baths over, on the road (realizing half way there that Aiden was missing a CI - oh the stress) and back home three hours later only to realize,
I fed everyone...
BUT Aiden.
Do I still get a trophy?
7 comments:
You know, when that happens, I always initially feel bad...but then I realize if the child in question had been hungry, I would have heard about it one way or another, and he would have gotten fed. LOL. LOOK at all you did... I'm pretty sure you deserve something.
I think we live parallel lives, lol! Except I have one less kiddo and no sporting activities (yet). I forgot to feed Nolan breakfast yesterday morning (he can't eat for a while after his morning meds), and ended up driving through Tim Horton's to buy the child a donut for his "brunch." Then ran to my MOPS group and speech therapy. So yeah, I could share that trophy with you.
Between AVT, preschool, regular school, and the kids' sports- you have your hands full! Give yourself a break, pour another glass of wine, and schedule a weekend away somewhere (g)! Ah, if only that were possible!
Everyone always says... don't worry... slow down... enjoy each day... I've come to realize those people either have no kids OR their kids are grown and they are watching parents raise children. I had to laugh through your post... it's as if I was in your shoes. Don't we hope our kids realize some day the sacrafices that are made for them? They will... when you have their own kids.
Kel - your'e right, I felt bad for oh, about 5 seconds, but then fed him a bowl of Lucky Charms and knew he'd be just fine.
Leah - It is amazing how our stories are one in the same lately! HA! I think Nolan and Aiden have some kind of connection going on here! They'll definitely meet some day!
Renee - I laughed at your last sentence because as I'm writing last night I wanted to call my mom and say thank you thank you thank you, as she pretty much raised three kids on her own since my dad was always gone with the military. I didn't realize her sacrifices until I had my own kids. She's my hero! ; )
My kids don't ever let me forget to feed them, but the rest of your story I can relate to. I feel like the energizer bunny (without the energized part) most of the time. At least I don't have to drive the kids back and forth to school, the bus does that much for me!
Love, Maggie
You still get your Mom of the Year Award!!!
Its amazing how much Mom's can multitask, get things done, try to keep everyone happy and than at the end of the day think " I really need some time for me"...I agree ~ you need to write it down so everyone knows when its "Mommy Time".
I felt bad for Thomas a few weeks ago ~ we were having a playdate at the park and my friend told me "Thomas' ear is blinking..is he OK?" I said yes...the batteries are dead ~ I'll replace them. I looked at my purse and thought "$hit ~ I changed purses and did NOT put batteries in the new one". I told Thomas he could only have one ear in for playing and he was fine ~ it bothered me more than him. Lesson learned ~ I try to make sure I have batteries with me all the time ~ although I know it will happen again.
Tammy,
I'm laughing in sympathy :0)
Some day (maybe far in the future, but someday) your children will rise up and call you blessed.
Julie
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